I haven;t written in here for a while, but right now i have no one to vent to without being called stupid or anything. So here it goes..
Today was my last day at work. I’m overly bummed out about it. I love everyone there and its going to be weird not seeing them. I hate it. I don’t want to leave but I have to. And I think I’ve started to like someone there. Ugh.
Lately, I’ve been feeling ugly. I look in the mirror or look at photos of myself and just criticize what is looking back at me. I’m told I’m pretty all the time by my girlfriends. Its not the same as being told I’m pretty from a guy. Do people think I;m ugly? Thats what I want to know. I know how I’m seen in my eyes, but how am I see in others? Am I just ugly or what? It sure as hell seems that way. NO ONE gives me a double take or anything. I just feel unpretty because I’ve been single for so long. It fuckin sucks. I;ve also been feeling FAT. I know I’m not fat. The weight I’m at is nothing I should be concerned about, but I hate looking at myself in the mirror sometimes because all I see is this ugly girl looking back at me. I need someone to tell me I’m beautiful everyday until I believe it because until then I’ll just keep looking at myself this way. I fucking Hate it. I’m just miserable. Help. I’m just sad depressed about everything. I don’t know what to fucking do anymore.
Had so much fun last night at the mall. I spent alot of money, but I don’t usually do that! We were out for like three hours just shopping. JAclin convinced our selves that since we are doing all this walking around the mall, cookie cake should be our reward! Best part of the night :)
Work soon, I think today is going to be a good day. Hoping to get my mind off of things. Then afterwards, I’m going shopping with Jaclin! I’m super excited. It should be fun! And I don’t have to go home right away and be all alone :)
The only reason I reblogged this was because this adorable cat was in a wittle box. That is all.